Wednesday, 1 October 2014

Maintaining a Long Distance Relationship



Today, I'm talking about something quite personal. The boy likes to remain quite anonymous, and I'm fine with that. But you guys might like to know a bit more about us. 

We've been together 3 years now, and most of that he's lived a minimum of an hour and a half's drive away, and sometimes about 4 hours away. Very recently he's been quite local (read 40 minutes away). I think that puts me in a reasonable position to offer some tips. This time of year a lot of existing relationships find themselves becoming long distance due to University. Me and the boy actually met while he was already at University, and had matured a bit. I actually don't think we'd have got on when he was younger, and I've told him that. So, we've always been long distance, we didn't have to make a transition to it. But, we've made it this far, and maybe we can help you go the distance. (see what I did there)

Trust

Absolutely number one priority. Trust has never been one of my strongest points. I'm insecure. But, with the boy it's always been there. And, it would never, ever have worked if there wasn't any trust. I've been the girl that can't trust the guy she's living with! It was more than justified to be fair, but my point is I used to go out of my mind wondering where previous boyfriends were, and I lived with them. There's absolutely no way me and the boy could survive the huge distance if I was feeling like that all the time. Getting the trust however, is down to you. With us, it was always there, right from the start.

Time

I think what helped us, especially in the early days, was taking things slowly. In previous relationships I've moved too quickly. I think the distance and the time helped us last longer in all honesty. We had the opportunity to get to know one another, at our own pace. There was no pressure. Which moves me on to my next point...We were always a priority to one another. I mean, you're not going to drive that far unless you really want to see someone. I think it's important to be realistic. A friend of mine once told me that long distance is only ever about casual and hooking up. But I couldn't disagree more. Who's going to spend 4 hours in the car, in stressful traffic, spending a fortune on petrol just for something casual?! Or a fortune on train fares? It's just not going to happen. And that, that right there, is probably what made the trust so much easier. 

Quality Time

When you don't see each other that much, it's important that you value the time you have together. Put your phone down (unless it's an emergency). The housework can wait. See your friends before and after the weekend. And just hibernate together. We've been quite naughty, we've continued to hibernate a lot, despite the fact we see more of each other now. But, we value our time together. I've been known to stay up really late for nights on end doing the housework, shopping, food preparation etc ready for the weekend, so all me and the boy had to do was enjoy it. 

Photos

This may be silly but it works for me. You're apart a lot. It can be sad at times. I surround myself with photos. My bedroom wall is a huge collage of all the happy memories we have together. Reminding me that they exist. That I might be alone on that particular evening, but it's not a permanent arrangement. 

Surprises

I love giving gifts. I often send the boy random things in the post. Some flapjacks. A get well soon box when he's feeling ill. A revision box, full of snacks etc when he's got exams. A welcome to your new home box. Valentine's boxes. You get the idea. I never tell him they're coming, so it's a lovely surprise when it gets there, and completely brightens his day. Notes are another thing, when I visited I leave little notes in random places. Just a little sentence or so, why I miss him, what I enjoyed doing together that weekend... I hide them, and then take photos of their locations to send to him when he least expects it. 

Contact

Pretty obvious really, but making time to talk to one another. I prefer text, so we're often in contact throughout the day. It's important to have a phone call, or video call every so often too, sometimes just hearing their voice makes everything better. Sometimes it's harder than others. The boy has spent numerous months abroad, and he's pretty good at losing his phone. If you can't talk, make sure you tell the other that somehow. A quick text, an email, a message on a friends phone if you've lost yours. It's not about explaining what you're doing, it's about making sure the other person doesn't feel deliberately ignored. I've never asked the boy where he is/what he's doing. Don't need to. 

Make Time for Yourself

Don't see all time apart as negative. Get yourself a hobby. I started a blog. I also started pole fitness classes. I see a fair bit of my friends. I see my family once a fortnight minimum. Don't sit and mope. Enjoy your me time. If you're apart a lot, and you only ever see it as a negative, you'll be moany all the time and no fun to talk to - for your other half or anyone else. 

Ultimately, if you're both in it for the long haul, you'll put the effort in. It's not always easy, but if you're with the right person you'll find a way. If your other half simply isn't putting the effort in, despite you killing yourself to make it work, maybe you need to work out if the us is important to them....

I hope that's helped. Feel free to leave me a comment or drop me a tweet if you have any questions. 

Have you ever been in a long distance relationship? Did it work out?

What are your tips?





Tuesday, 30 September 2014

Guest Post - e.l.f lipsticks with Jenna from Promising Rose

Hi, I'm Jenna from Promising Rose. I'd really like to thank Aimee for giving me the opportunity to do this, I am so grateful! 

A few weeks ago I posted an E.L.F. haul on my blog and Aimee has asked me to do a review on some of the products I purchased. 

By far my favourite products I bought from E.L.F. were the lipsticks, these products are some of the best I have ever owned, at £1.95 each I cannot complain.




L-R, Fearless, Captivating, Voodoo
 

When these lipsticks arrived in the post they came nicely packaged in a cardboard packet. The actual lipstick packaging itself is definitely not the best however it can only be expected for the price. They come in a silver and transparent chamber which is pleasing to the eye but quite bad in quality and I often find the twist-up mechanism jamming, however this should not put you off when thinking of purchasing these as the quality of the product more than makes up for the packaging.

The texture of these lipsticks are amazing, they're so creamy and moisturising but also super pigmented. I can get a reasonably long wear from them, around 2 hours but after that they usually wear away and leave a subtle stain to your lips, also the colours definitely look brighter in the pictures!

One of the shades I purchased was Captivating, a natural brown shade with orange undertones. It wears really well with so many outfits and it's definitely a good everyday shade. It's the one lipstick I reach for most.


Captivating

Another shade I purchased was Voodoo, a red that can be built up to achieve more colour, it has a slight berry undertone and I've been reaching for this shade more than I thought I would, just to add a pop of colour to the everyday look that I wear. 


Voodoo

And the last shade I purchased was Fearless, a brighter, more true red that I have been slightly neglecting as I'm not too sure that I can pull it off but this would look great on anyone that can, this lipstick is definitely a good one to buy if you want to try a red lip but don't want to spend too much incase you don't like the way it looks on you. 


Fearless

Overall these lipsticks are definitely worth the money, if not more and I will definitely be purchasing more shades once I am more comfortable with wearing lipstick!

If you want to see my E.L.F. haul, head on over to Promising Rose to see that and some of my other posts. I apologise for the lack of posts but I'm actually very new to the blogging world!

Have you purchased any E.L.F. lipsticks?

Monday, 29 September 2014

Cheeky Little Fashion Haul (Primark and New Look)

Well, it's all about the hauls lately isn't it? I've been doing my fair share of shopping. I don't get the chance to shop that often. But since I started my new job, I've been treating myself. The pay rise has helped! I'm aware I need to calm it down a little to be honest. My aim is to save more than I spend. But it's so hard!!

Anyway, what do you think to my choices?




This dress and cardigan are from Primark. Not my colours at all. But something about them just grabbed me. Like I said the other day, I'm making some strange choices. The cardigan is more of a peachy/pink colour than the photo suggests, and the dress is a black background with green and peach floral pattern. I'm tempted to wear this to a Christening I'm going to soon. The cardigan was £9 and the dress was either £10 or £12. I'm thinking £10. No bad right?


Now, I've had my eye on this for a while. It's from New Look. I've mentioned a few times how my new job has meant I can wear whatever I like, not just purple and black. I'm really having fun injecting some colour back into my life! This vibrant yellow shirt (very nearly mustard but not quite as dark) looks fab with black work trousers. I can throw it over jeans for a casual look. Or even rock it with my navy work mini and some light brown ankle boots. (I'm waiting for the weather to be cold enough for tights for that look) Yellow Long Sleeved Chiffon Shirt. £17.99


I decided I needed some new jeans. I think it's been a couple of years since I last bought any. I was disappointed I had to go for a size 12 to be honest. But I struggle fitting my muscley legs into anything smaller (that's pole fitness for you). These are a lovely shade of blue, skinny jeans, that are so soft to the touch. Unbelievably comfy too. Also from New Look. Navy Supersoft Skinny Jeans. £19.99


This grey cardigan is the same as the peach one above. At £9 it was hard to resist. The peach one is my casual one, and the grey one is for work. 


Now how cute are these socks??

Owls, Foxes, and Hedgehogs (or hodgehegs if you're me...). Perfect for lounging around in. And a bargain at 3 pairs for £4. 

What have you been buying lately?








Sunday, 28 September 2014

What's on my nails - Autumnal Edit


This colour is stunning right? It's from the Aquarium Collection by Barry M and it's called Caspian. I picked it up very recently in my Tesco Beauty Haul. Yes, Tesco!! While I'm quite proud of this photo, I still don't think it does the colour justice. It is a stunning metallic rose gold. It catches the light beautifully, and looks slightly different colours in each light. For £3.99 it's a bargain. This colour just screams Autumn to me. Don't you think? It might not be bang on trend. It might not be a dark berry. But, the heart wants what the heart wants, and mine wants rose gold nails for Autumn. 




I don't go for neutral nails. For me, this is neutral. It's subtle enough for daily wear, while still being colourful enough to pack a punch. No boring nudes for me. And, as the colour is light and shiny, it hides chips very well. I'm not great with my nails. I'm just not very delicate. I only have to look at them and they chip. This, however has lasted a few days. And that's without a top coat. For me, that's damn good going, and I'm impressed with it's staying power. But, best of all, the chips are barely noticeable, so I can leave it on until (if) I get bored. 

What colour nails are you rocking this season?





Saturday, 27 September 2014

Guest Post - Pamper Evening with Emily of The Lady and The Blog

I love 'me' time. And by that I mean good quality me time. My daily commute doesn't count, nor does tidying the house alone. 
I think we're all guilty of over- working, over- thinking and generally over- doing it, sometimes without even realising. So I put aside time every now and then for a proper pamper session. If I can't go to the spa, the spa can come to me. 



Some weeks I'll have a bubble bath and get a cheapy paperback soggy (the cheesier and trashier the read the better I think) other times I'll pamper from the comfort of my bed doing face masks, nails and the like. 

Origins Drink up Intensive overnight mask is so worth the praise it gets. It smells divine and delivers on the hydration front too. One to slap on liberally and reap the rewards the following day. 

I'm incredibly lazy when it comes to body care. Even on a chilled out pamper evening I find I can't be arsed to faff about waving my arms around waiting for body lotion to dry so Vaseline Spray and Go is perfect. 

This particular week I opted for Essie Mint Candy Apple, which perhaps isn't entirely season appropriate, but never mind. Rules are there to be broken sometimes. 

Lastly before bed, I used The Body Shop Wild Rose Hand Butter which is thicker than your average hand cream, but well worth applying last thing at night so it can sink in overnight. Another fine smelling product too. 

So grab your favourite mug (Cath Kidston fyi) filled with your favourite drink (hot choccy, hold the marshmallows) ditch the technology and relax. You deserve it! 

P.S thanks to Aimee for letting me post, this is my first guest post so I hope it's not been a disaster. You can check out my blog here